The Interview

I started wondering... what kind of things will Bill ask me when I get to New York? Of course, there is always the possibility that I will meet with Barbara instead of Bill. For the purposes of this drill, however, I figured I'd think up some practice questions and responses to help me prepare.

Bill: You're WHO?
Cynthia: I'm Cynthia Campfield, well actually Cynthia Scheltema, but some people refer to me simply as "Cynthia". I think it's because of the whole mystique associated with those one worded woman wonders like "Madonna, Cher, LJo, Barbie..." My best friend calls me Cynderella. He was also my Maid of Honor at my wedding (another story).

Bill: So what do you have in common with the ladies of The View?
Cynthia: Well, I'm not sure how much I have in common with them, but I do have experiences and qualities that complement them. For instance, like Meredith I prefer commando (at least with jeans). Like Joy, I too have been a redhead. Elizabeth... well, she may have been on the show "Survivor", but I'm a card carrying cancer survivor. Unlike Star, I'm comfortable enough with my quest to be younger and thinner to share my personal experiences. Like Barbara, I have one daughter (whom I love dearly, even if she is a teenager) and a puppy dog.
Unlike Rosie, however, I love high heels.

Bill: Are you a good witch or a bad witch?
Cynthia: I'm a registered Republican.

Bill: Why did you decide to pursue this at this stage in your life?
Cynthia: I'm not dead yet...and besides I think that any co-host for The View should bring with her valuable life lessons. I have had many stages in my life and hope to have many more. At this point in my life, I've come to the conclusion that I'm not going to get any taller, but that's about as far as my certainty (about anything) goes.

Bill: What do you think of Brad Pitt?
Cynthia: ugh! I am soooo over him. I hope he and Angie are happy together.

Bill: Was the break-up hard for you?
Cynthia: Of course it was. I'm only a living, breathing, red blooded American female.
Let's move on, okay?

MORE to come...
I have to paint my nails.